


John's Gun

by TARDISinthebedroom



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Episode: s01e01 A Study in Pink, M/M, Short One Shot, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-10
Updated: 2014-12-10
Packaged: 2018-02-28 20:40:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2746322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TARDISinthebedroom/pseuds/TARDISinthebedroom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A small snapshot into the tale of the gun we all know - John Watson's gun. From killer to protector.</p>
            </blockquote>





	John's Gun

**Author's Note:**

> Seeing as suicidal thoughts are something I've dealt with, part of this is influenced by my own past. The rest by a sudden, inexplicable impulse to write about John's feelings towards his weapon. Enjoy!

     John sat at his desk, a small lamp the only light, shining down on him and the object in his hands. He twirled the cool metal between his clammy hands, his breath still slowing from his most recent nightmare.  
     " _JOHN! Oh God, HELP ME!" His boots slid in the bloody mud, gunshots ringing around him. They'd been unprepared, taken by surprise. A flash and John was heading away from the enemy. Or where he assumed the enemy to be. A man, groaning, crying out, slung over his shoulders in the fireman's carry position._  
     He gasped, sitting up straighter in the chair and shaking his head. With every passing minute, the killing machine in his hands seemed to weigh more and more. He should get it over with now before it became too heavy for him to lift...  
     The click of the clip discharging made him jump as his hands seemed to move of their own accord, putting the gun away as a single word rang through the confines of his head: NO.  
\-------------------------------------  
     When John moved in with Sherlock, the machine had moved in too. It was no longer haunting John every moment he was awake, but he couldn't just leave it behind in his old flat. It was his burden, his demon, to carry around. A doctor's killing tool.  
\---------------------------------------  
     John excused himself to bring the machine to the crime scenes on account of "it could be dangerous" and his flatmate, as well as the flat, had already begun to grow on him. He didn't want to lose either because he'd been too much of a coward to handle bringing the machine with him.  
     And then Sherlock bloody ran off without him. And with the killer, no less! It hadn't been easy to get around Lestrade and his men, then catch a cab and follow the tracking device on the pink phone, but John managed.  
     Running through the echoing halls, John had given up on sneaking. His cries of "SHERLOCK!" rang in each room he checked. Each room, each floor, all empty!  
     Until John saw something, briefly, in the window of one room. Running to said window, he peered across the alley to see Sherlock and an old man standing, alone, in the other building. Cursing, John debated on whether or not to risk running over to the other building, when he saw the pills.  
The gun was in his hand, up to shoulder height, safety released, sighted, shot. And John was out the door before the man hit the floor, not even needing to check to know the shot was fatal.  
     He crouched in the shadows outside the building, turning the gun over in his hands as the parking lot filled with police and ambulances. His hands were steady for the first time in months and, surprisingly, his heart was full. He didn't care if he was going to jail. His flatmate was safe. Everyone in London was now safe from that killer, as John too was saved from a different killer.  
     Standing, John pocketed his gun, his tool of protection, and went to collect the idiot of a Consulting Detective.  
\-----------------------------------  
     Now, John keeps his gun close on hand, in the desk drawer, on his bedside table, even in his coat pocket. But not because he wants it on hand in case the urge to end his life reappears, no no. He keeps it on hand because he never knows when Sherlock will run into trouble again and will need John's help to pull him through it alive.

**Author's Note:**

> My first published work, yay! Hope you enjoyed reading and if you did, please leave a simple like or even a comment if you have compliments or suggestions :)


End file.
